Home = Jesus!

5 days before Christmas and the frost has kissed everything outside but still we have no snow..! This Alaskan girl is missing her white stuff! See, this time last year I was back in Alaska for Christmas vacation, where the snow is everywhere..along with the below zero temperatures! Not gunna lie, its strange to think its been a whole year since I have been back Alaska but to be honest, I fee like God is doing something big in my heart through NOT being there! ~*~There's something about the first Christmas away from "home"...its bitter sweet. You miss all the things you would be doing if you were there. The family dinners, the traditions you would partake in, and the feeling of being "home" for the holidays. Am I missing all that? YES!! But, if I were being completely honest here, there's a part of me that is okay with it all. I'm okay with not having to deal with the craziness of traveling over the holidays. I'm okay with not taking time off work and worrying about paying my bills. I'm okay with not having enough of me to go around as everyone and their mother wants to see me and having places to be and only being one person! What my heart is having a hard time with is not being around some of the people I love the most and have journeyed life with for the past umpteen years. I miss my family and my friends who are like family more then I can explain. I would give anything to hug them, see their sweet faces, and to just be able to sit down and chat with them and yet, that wont be happening this year. As I have been thinking about not being back in Alaska and praying about it all I can hear God's sweet whisper in my ear...I am your home! See, I have been getting caught up on the mere fact of not being "home" for Christmas when really, no matter if I were in Alaska, or I'm here in Michigan it doesn't matter-Its not about the location of which I'm in, its about me residing in Christ! I can feel our sweet God drawing me into a deeper reliance on Him and even though its hard, its beautiful! I feel like He is taking all that I have ever known to be familiar away and making something even sweeter out it. I said this in my last post and I'm gunna say it again...! When you take away the perfect tree, the presents, the family dinners, and all that is familiar-all you have is you and Jesus, and that my friends is the BEST THING EVER!~*~I feel like God is making Michigan home for me in a whole new way. Don't get me wrong, I was born and raised in Alaska and it will always hold a special place in my heart. I'm just feeling like right now, in this season of life, Michigan is it! I have felt like this place was home ever since my first visit here, but this is different and I don't know if I can explain it! God is building a new circle of friends (family), He's creating memories I will never forget, He has healed me in ways I know would not have happened if I were back in Alaska, and He's slowly taking the desire of Alaska out of my heart (not easy to say). I will always miss and love my family and friends and look forward to the visits back and I will always miss the majestic mountains, but honestly-that's about it. We have a saying back in Alaska about people who leave..."They'll be back!" I'm not saying that God couldn't call me back to Alaska and that I wouldn't follow if that's where He was leading me. I'm just saying, as of right now, I don't see that happening. My home is in Jesus and where He has me, and right now its Michigan! ~*~I am in a time where my heart is aching to be with those who I love dearly back in Alaska...I think they call it "homesickness"-It comes and goes with the holiday's, birthday's, graduations, weddings, and events that pass. People have told me I love hard and that is a beautiful thing, but that whole "loving hard" is what makes it difficult being thousands of miles away from those I love and miss. Yes, God has made Michigan home but I will always miss those people God hand placed in my life back in Alaska. I'm thanking God for those people and this aching feeling of missing them, as its a sign of loving and being loved.